Jesus Take the Wheel...

So this morning I found myself in the middle of a four car pile up on the highway during the a.m. artery clog of gotta get to work traffic.  There I sat on a 70 mile an hour highway minding my own business when here comes one of those standard white work vans (probably had a body in it) veering off to the right--to avoid the traffic sitting at a dead stop, I assumed.  He hit me and sent me into the Lexus I'd been staring at for the last 10 minutes. Turns out a small, elfish 20 year old in a small, elfish Prius started the whole messy chain of events--at least according to Serial Killer Van.  I always thought people who cried whiplash were just being dramatic, but now I'm pretty sure it's a thing. Nobody panic though, I managed to make it through the day.
Then I got home to find something from my doctor's office in the mail, only along with the usual info on the envelope the words "Geriatric Services" had been added. Awesome... It was a bill.  A really big one.  For a routine vagina inspection. This is reason number 6,832 why I recently changed jobs. Shitty insurance and even shittier people available to answer questions about shitty insurance. But I'm a government employee now, so hopefully that means the only tinkering around down there will be done by an elected official from now on.--Actually I did get ogled at Petsmart this evening, maybe I should've asked him if he wanted to take a look at my kitty while I was there. It would have been free and probably just as thorough. But that may have been misuse of a state seal.
Anyway, it's looking like I'll be on the phone with insurance companies for the rest of my life. It goes without saying I will be tucked into bed as soon as I hit "publish" here.
But I do have two things going for me tonight.  It's kid's week on Jeopardy so I'm almost guaranteed to win at something, and I have a little something doing double duty for me in the freezer.