What is my fate, am I supposed to pray...

2016 Road Trip.  Part Un.

How long should it take to get it together after what is supposed to be the rest and relaxation of vacation?  Being that I don't really rest on vacation, I'm still having some struggles.  I always have these visions of myself looking flowy and relaxed and breeze blown on a boardwalk somewhere-a stuffed animal some romantic show off won for me under my arm.  But that never happens.  I always somehow end up in the places travel brochures like to pretend don't exist.

I started this journey with my mind set on Captain Crunch french toast and bloody marys in Baltimore, but due to a late in the game suggestion and no real plan I ended up at Lexington Market. Just like any other "major" city, navigating Baltimore takes some savvy and charm.  One minute you're at Camden Yards, the next you're in a scene from The Wire. To be fair Lexington Market isn't some hole in the wall--it's definitely on the radar.  Though touted as a historic farmers' market, this place is obviously not for tourists.  And the locals will know you are one.

Bustling but not vibrant, at 9 a.m. on a Saturday this is where the elderly and mentally ill go to shuffle along and buy their weekly supply of rabbit parts and block cheese and grey pickles.  Maybe a lottery ticket and counterfeit cell phone cover.  (And if planning a party, one baker even offers Hannah Montana cakes for all those 2008 pre-teens.)  This is the kind of farmers' market where the merchants are suspicious of cameras and nothing for sale actually comes from a local farm--I mean there is produce, but you just have to trust me on this.  You won't find anything artisanal here.   But what you will find is Chinese food and carnival style sausage and peppers for breakfast.  And the people watching doesn't get better.  In fact I watched one of those people leave the restroom without washing her hands and go back to serving up turkey sandwiches.

But all in all, breakfast in Baltimore was a success-- I only had to say "what motherfucker!" once (which terrified my wife because she has 0 sense of adventure and -4 street smarts) and I ended up going with the chicken and waffles.  With powdered sugar-because, duh.